You are Not a Tree

“If you are not happy with your life, you need to do something to change it. Do not stay stuck. You are not a tree.”

If you read the name of the article and the quote, you might think – “Wow that’s harsh, what does this girl know?”

Let me tell you what I know. If you backtrack my life to about two years ago, I literally lost everything – some by choice and some by a domino effect. It broke me in ways I cannot explain. I literally just laid on the bathroom floor one day and said “God just take me because I cannot do this anymore.”

Now fast forward two years. I am beyond happy. I look forward to each day and am excited for my future. But this feeling did not come overnight. It took time. But first, I needed to change what was not working for me and accept that things were going to be dicey for a while in order to have the future I wanted.

In a year’s time, I had a miscarriage, filed for divorce, filed for bankruptcy which included losing my house and good credit score, lost my job, moved back in with my mom, and said goodbye to my three cats who stayed with my ex. My life was hell. I also lost friends along the way who claimed my shit was “too much” for them to handle.

So, as you can see, it was as if a wrecking ball had come flying into my life taking everything with it. It started with the miscarriage, which really had me reevaluate my life and what I wanted. I had been unhappy in my marriage for a while, but was too scared and too sad to do anything. My miscarriage forced me to focus on myself.

After spending many nights crying my eyes out, I decided I needed to make a change no matter how terrifying it was. Once I signed my name on the petition for divorce, I knew there was no turning back. On top of it just being plain scary to end a ten year relationship with someone, I knew that going through with the divorce meant I had to be willing to file for bankruptcy (due to the house loans we had taken out). It was as though one thing just lead to another.

Frankly, looking back, I still don’t know how I did it all – except for just putting one foot in front of another and never looking back.

The point of my story is this – if you are unhappy, it is up to you to change it. Do not stand still and hope for the best. Don’t wait for the circumstances to be perfect or the right amount of money to come along. It is never going to happen. If you want to be unstuck, YOU need to get yourself moving.

It starts with a decision – one powerful decision to change your life. Then comes an action. And after that, it’s one small thing after another. The key is never looking back. Look toward your future and make your dreams come true.


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